When Change Feels Hard: Wisdom to Help You Through

Change is a natural and inevitable part of life. Sometimes change can be exciting, and at other times it can be a source of great anxiety, especially when the change is unexpected or unwelcome. In this episode of What’s the Universe Say About That?, Mary and Michael ask the Universe: How do we live, and even thrive, in a world that is always changing?

The wisdom that came through offers a practical and compassionate roadmap for finding peace, joy, and steadiness amid the uncertainty we all experience. If you’re moving through a transition or simply trying to understand one, this may be arriving at just the right time for you.

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maryobana.com

To arrange a private reading with Mary to receive the guidance the Universe has for you, visit:
maryobana.com/private-readings

For more information about Mary's book "Shine: A Simple Guide to Finding Your Light and Letting It Shine on the World", visit:
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Transcript

[Mary Obana]

Are you uncomfortable with change?

[Mike Lannon]

You know, for all of us, change is a certainty in life. So, we wanted to ask, what are we to know about change and how can we better embrace it?

[Mary Obana]

Welcome to this episode of What's the Universe Say about that. I'm Mary Obana, and along

with my husband, Michael, we ask the universe for answers. You see, I'm blessed with this beautiful gift where I get quiet and I can connect with the loving guidance of the universe.

[Mike Lannon]

So, today, you'll see and hear Mary connect directly to that divine guidance and hear the words of wisdom flow directly through her in response to questions about life and the challenges we all face at certain times.

[Mary Obana]

So, welcome to our home.

[Mike Lannon]

And welcome to this now normal, but always amazing part of our daily lives. So, sit back, get ready, and let's hear what the universe has to say about that.

[Mary Obana]

Let's do it.

[Mike Lannon]

Hi, everybody.

[Mary Obana]

Hi.

[Mike Lannon]

So, today, I've got a question about change.

You know, there's different times of our life, seasons, that change is either thrust upon us or it's something we really want to do. But for some of those times and for many people, change is something that can make them feel real uncomfortable.

[Mary Obana]

Yeah.

[Mike Lannon]

Yeah, it can be exciting or it can be nerve-wracking with all the uncertainty. Sometimes, even though they may even want to change, they know they need to change. But the inertia of staying where they are, it puts up incredible resistance to change.

And so, I think, you know, the question I have today is, how do we recognize or deal with that resistance to change? And how does that kind of work with the feeling of opportunity, new beginnings, things like that? So, what should we know about?

Change.

[Mary Obana]

Change.

[Mike Lannon]

I mean, the one thing that's permanent in life is change.

So, what should we know about change?

[Mary Obana]

Okay.

[Mike Lannon]

All right, here we go.

[Mary Obana]

Sounds good.

[Mike Lannon]

All right, here we go.

[The Universe]

Yes, change.

It is a staple of the human condition, isn't it? Change is exciting. Change is unnerving for others.

And at times, change can feel different. Change is something that has been introduced to the human experience so that you all, in your human experience, can expand, learn, and grow. You see, if you are always in the state of idleness, doing the same thing, always with the same conditions and environment, there are no new things being introduced, new experiences for you.

Yes, change is certain, but it can be something that can be resisted, as you say. What you are to know about change. The uncertainty is what causes the angst with change.

Change is a delightful thing when you are in anticipation of it, excited about it. But when you are not, this is where we will focus our attention at the moment. When change feels unnerving. You are in a situation, perhaps, that you were pushed into, that came upon you, that didn't feel like it was something you were perhaps ready for. 

Change and that uncertainty is what creates the anxiety. But again, as so many of our messages convey, it is all about the perspective one brings to the circumstance.

Of course, one can get whipped up with all the possible things that can go wrong. Change, because it is uncertain, can lead some to focus on all that will be unwanted. Change can also ignite in an individual all the things that they worry about losing with change.

The focus is on what they feel will be lost, what they fear will come, you see. All of it grounded in fear. The perspective of change that serves your highest good is one of anticipation and trust.

There's so much ahead for each and every one of you that can only be if you move out of your current situation and into something new. Change can be large or small. Change can be living without someone you love. Change can be moving to a new job. Change can be in a new situation, a new vacation, a place you haven't visited before. All of the uncertainty that comes with change.

But with every new circumstance, new situation, there are always new experiences and discoveries. And growth. Change comes with so many wonderful things.

The hardest part of change is the anticipation of it and arriving newly into it. Once you are in that new place, you become more accustomed to all that is and all that accompanies that new experience, that new circumstance, that new place, that new situation. So, trusting that there's so much ahead for you, trusting that there is so much expansion for you, discovery and growth, challenge and delight.

And yes, challenges. But change is what is the igniter of growth. Letting go of the fear and leaning into the trust allows you to welcome change.

Look for the good. There's always good to be seen, to be found, to be discovered in every new situation. Even when you are there because you do not choose it to be.

Change is also an opportunity for new beginnings, an opportunity to consider what it is you want for yourself in this new experience. Change is an invitation to operating and living and moving forward with intention. When you are going about your day with the usual everyday things you've always done, it is often difficult to stop and ask yourself what it is you wish for because you are so used to and busy in the momentum of doing as you always have.

These opportunities for change, whether it's a new season, a new year, a new job, whatever it might be, is an opportunity to step back and an invitation to ask yourself what it is you wish, what it is you wish for in this new phase, place, of your journey.

[Mike Lannon]

Can you speak to, well, I'm going to speak on personal experience here. I've never been afraid of change, but I do recognize that my perception of change when I was 20 is different now that I'm old and ancient. And I think a lot of people after a certain age, maybe speak to this audience, that change at an older age feels more like loss, whereas at a younger age, it feels more like opportunity or different or new and exciting.

How would you bring this message or this wisdom to someone who is older and sees things changing around them in their body, their friends, their living situation, their social circle, that's changing and it feels like change is loss.

[The Universe]

Once again, this is all a matter of choice, how you choose to focus your energy in any situation.

The example of the young one who is excited about the opportunity that is ahead, focusing on not that which is being left behind, but instead that which is ahead for them. One who has lived and has had the gift of living many years, who have more experiences, more comforts, more things they have become accustomed to.

Once again, where do you choose to focus? Life always has change, circumstances change, people change, conditions change, environments change, jobs change, lives change. Where is it that you are focusing your attention?

Is it on that which has been lost or focusing on that which will be no more? Or is it on that which lies ahead? Where is the benefit to you of focusing on all that will be no more?

Where does that leave you? Where does that leave your life? You are gifted with this human experience.

And yes, the human experience comes with a great many unwanted situations andcircumstances. But to exist in this human experience means to live in this human experience.

What is it that is yet to be discovered?

What is it that is yet to be learned? What is it that is yet to be given? You can live in that which has always been or you can move forward with that which is ahead for you.

It is always a matter of choice. The choice that you bring and the perspective you adopt in the circumstance. That is, it is always a matter of perspective.

You get to choose.

[Mike Lannon]

And all that is ahead, that can include what's beyond this world?

[The Universe]

Everything is ahead.

The experiences that are in the material world, the experiences that are in the non-physical world. But the focus is on what is in front of you at the moment. Where is the opportunity for living in the moment?

What is it that you can soak in right now? You are in always the midst of change. But the only thing that is, is the moment that is in front of you.

Focus on that which is. Not that which is not. Not that which is yet to be.

Soak in everything that has been given to you right now. You see, the change ahead, the future ahead, is just the moment that is ahead. Don't sacrifice the moment that is for the moment that was, or the moment that is not yet to be.

[Mike Lannon]

Thank you for that reminder.

[The Universe]

It is our pleasure. It is always a joy and delight to be in discussion and conversation with you.

[Mike Lannon]

Thank you.

[Mary Obana]

Mm-hmm.

[Mike Lannon]

I feel like sometimes my questions are, like I'm in a courtroom, where I'm trying to take it here, or thinking there's an answer here, or maybe there's an answer here, and they are amazingly articulate at bringing it right down the middle again.

[Mary Obana]

Mm-hmm.

[Mike Lannon]

It's present.

[Mary Obana]

Mm-hmm.

[Mike Lannon]

You know, it's really a challenge, because my mind always, you know, okay, I can't focus on the past, because that's already happened. So my mind wants to say, okay, then I'll focus on the future. And, uh...

[Mary Obana]

If I can't have that toy, I'll have this one.

[Mike Lannon]

Exactly. And it just keeps coming back, and it's really an important reminder that, like, every day, the mind can only live in the past and the future.

[Mary Obana]

Mm-hmm.

[Mike Lannon]

And we are only to live in the present.

[Mary Obana]

Yeah.

[Mike Lannon]

And it's, yeah, it's just, it's like, it's so, so impactful to hear that and be reminded of that. So that was good. That was good.I think, you know, I was thinking this would be good for a particular time of the year or something like that, but as we started off, and as that message said, change is upon us every single moment. So I think this applies to anyone and everyone.

[Mary Obana]

At any time.

[Mike Lannon]

Yeah, exactly, at any time.

[Mary Obana]

And the other part too, which I thought was a good reminder, is the intention setting.

[Mike Lannon]

Yeah.

[Mary Obana]

You know, you can just get into this groove of repeating every day the thing that you always have done.

And the...

[Mike Lannon]

That you can do the on-repeat mode because you are resisting change, but you can also be on the on-repeat mode.

[Mary Obana]

Just momentum of...

[Mike Lannon]

Momentum.

[Mary Obana]

Yeah, exactly.

[Mike Lannon]

So you think, hey, I'm changing all the time, but it's just completely unintentional.

[Mary Obana]

Yeah. And next thing you know, days and months and years have passed and it's the same thing.

[Mike Lannon]

Yeah. So you end up in a place that you wake up one day and say, how did I get here?

[Mary Obana]

Yeah.

[Mike Lannon]

So.

[Mary Obana]

Okay.

[Mike Lannon]

Good.

[Mary Obana]

All right, well...

[Mike Lannon]

All right, don't go changing. Don't sing, don't sing, don't sing.

[Mary Obana]

I was gonna.

[Mike Lannon]

I know you were. All right. I saved the world from Mary's voice.

[Mary Obana]

You were spared.

[Mike Lannon]

All right, well, listen, we look forward to seeing you again next time.

[Mary Obana]

Yep. Take it easy.

[Mike Lannon]

All right, bye-bye.